Rubbish-y Me.

Monday, October 16, 2006

*my pathetic life

there use to be a little girl who truly believe she was lucky..every thing she wish came through and she had loving parents and nice siblings to play with..day by day she grew up..she began to realise her life was far frm lucky..her father n mother were not as loving as it seems..and her life began to change as she grow older..she had to see the ugly side of life..and tt girl was me..but i learnt to be strong and count my blessings..i have learn to be optimistic..nothing will stop me..haha

today is a super sad day..its getting back results day..haha..i fail 2 h2..means i cant promote le..so sad..i have been trying to swallow my tears but i fail..i cried..in sch..haha..i could not take it anymore le..its so saddening tt all my hard work hasn't paid off..i thought i would have did much better..den i broke the news to my mama..she saw me broke dwn..n she say..no use crying,,its over and i just have to move on..but more tears came dwn..its all too late..i have nv felt so hopeless before..i think i am not suited for jc ba..i m not dere yet.i shld have gone to poly..haix..1 year wasted..whenever i think of this i will want to cry..den i keep thinking y my schwork has become like this..i guess its distractions..all the family problems and adaptations to changes i have to go through..i guess its too much for me..i should be glad that i didn't go mad..counting my blessing...i wish this could be a nightmare n everything will be fine aft tt..guess i have to learn to face the reality n not run away frm it..i can do it..haha..i shall not be discouraged..haha..
but now i worry that my eyes will swollen tml..ono..shity..haix..i feel so tired suddenly..tired of my life..haha..sounds like i wanna commit sucide..nope..i won't do tt..i just need time to cool off and realise tt i am fortunate..so i guess i will focus on op n a levels cl ba..do wat i can..dun wanna cry over spill milk again..

i noe its no point crying over spill milk..but i just cant control it..perphaps aft a big cry..i will stop and become more happy..so dun stop me!

im rubbish-ing.

__________